I have been thinking about this for a very long time and have been reading a lot about it of-late. As I grow old, the more I realize and see how emotionally void many women around me are.
I see women beating themselves up to rise to the occasion and learn the art of perfection in every small thing they do. For a very long time, our society has equated the idea of women to sacrifice and has made many women guilty for truly trying to be themselves. A woman who has been married and serving her family sees bringing her kids and husband up as the only duty that could give her recognition and badge of honor.
Her family recognizes her merits not because she could work in a multinational company earning comfortably but by how many times she was able to cook for her family, attend her kid’s PTAs and how accommodative she is with her in-laws. Why is it still not a norm for men to be confined by the same rules? If you are men complaining that you still do all of these? Congratulations that is the freedom and liberty you have to chose what you want to do!
A woman, a recent graduate, entering the corporate world, is called more ambitious for wanting to do many things at work. What is worst is, she is told- “you are fairly doing well for your age, When I was your age I hardly did any of this… blah blah,” Why is she asked, about getting married, having babies and leaving the job to take care of the family? Why is this still not a norm to ask the same question to men?
A woman, loving all of herself truly, wears whatever the hell she wants! Why is she asked not to wear “exposing” “ revealing” clothes? Is it because she may ask for it? Do not slut-shame her!
We are in the freaking 21 century, DO NOT ASK HER TO QUIT EVERYTHING she is doing to get married to someone. Don’t tell her that’s the first step of many sacrifices she would have to make to keep everyone around her happy. It doesn’t have to work that way. The only true question you would have to ask her is if she was truly happy with herself and the in-space she is contributing to.
About damn time you stop glorifying her for being a badass and not for getting married at 24!
If you are a man reading this and mentally mapping how profusely you treat a woman, kudos to you! keep doing more of it consciously!
If you are a woman identifying yourself with any of what I said above, it is about time you stand up for yourself and seek what is right and what gives you happiness. Take a break and some self-care time for yourself and do not attach any guilt to it.
If you are a man/woman who knows someone stuck, extend your helping hand, the world surely needs more of you all!